Am i home yet?

I can't stop traveling. I just came back from a mini - trip to NYC hosted by the gracious Jessica in her swanky bachelor pad. It was quite exciting to meet so many people i read daily at the little party - that for most of the night i was lost for words - however, i still woke up with a sore throat from all the talking (ahem, yelling). I ended up catching the Chinatown bus to Boston at around one o'clock, but i nearly missed it. It turns out tickets are now $15 (i was outraged) and they don't take credit cards. I offered to give the guy the eleven bucks as collateral for my future ticket but he assured me that there would be a place for me on the bus. Ofcourse by the time i found an ATM and got the much needed cash the guy had sold out the tickets. I was able to politely remind him that he promised me a ticket and surprisingly he gave in and let me on the bus, i was the last one on. There's a reason people want to get on the bus first. As soon as i sat down in the back of the bus i noticed a strange smell - something between stale urine and raw fish. The only thing that could have made it worse was the bumper to bumper traffic. My back gave out about hour two. After the thirty hour trip from Israel, the six hour bus ride shouldn't have been a biggy, surprisingly it was.
Update: I'm definitely home, can't wait to leave.

check it out (please)

I wrote a post about my visit to Jerusalem a while back. I just posted the second part. Check it out.

I'm back in the USSR... ok no i'm not (thank G-d), but i am back in the States - missing Israel already. The first thing that struck me when i walked outside JFK was how weak the sun is here compared to the Israeli sun. I didn't even get the urge to reach for my sunglasses - in Israel it's actually unsafe to go without sunglasses for a prolonged period of time in the summer the amount of shade also surprised me. However, even though i left a lot of love behind - in coming back i have felt the awesome love that is here. The thirty hours of traveling weren't so bad, just a bit horrible. My back hurts and i am in a desperate need of a shower.
Here are some observations from the road:
- do not ever enter into the designated smoking area in the airport - you will die.
- if, in the middle of the night, at a deserted airport you notice a strange Japanese man following you around, move often and avoid eye contact
- talk to kids sitting next to you on airplanes, they are usually more pleasant than the adults ( i learned how to play UNO!)
- ask for a lot of red wine
- bring a pillow (and blanket) - it gets chilly in a deserted airport
- mp3 player with lots of memory helps. A lot.
- surprisingly, israeli vending machine coffee tastes better than the french cafe coffee
- the croissants are better in France, even in the airport, but not by much
- when needing to get somewhere fast, you will always end up on the slowest vehicle possible

Sigh...

I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go
Sorry for the corny lyrics...but dammit i don't know want to go. I leave for Ben Gurion airport at one today, then it's off to Charles De Gaulle Airport for a twelve hour torture of sitting in the airport all night. And then JFK airport and only then to Boston. I have missed my family and friends - but i was so happy to take a break from the daily responsibilities - i'm little bit scared now. I said most of my goodbyes yesterday - i like to have done more cleanly and faster but no such luck. So now i've been in a state of agitation since mid-afternoon. I always get this way before trips - nervous energy - but this is nervous energy plus the sadness of a long goodbyes and some emotional unresolved business. I'll miss Haifa terribly - the breathtaking views i got to experience coming from work everyday, the gracious people who hosted me and let me share with them their family time, the friends i made who put with my none existent Hebrew and all the boys i fell in love with here. I'll stop with the sappiness now.

Donnie Darko

One of my favorite movies comes out in theaters again, as a director's cut. Donnie Darko. In similiar news - Kristin Dunst and Jake Gyllanhal have broken up? Why hadn't i heard about this? Not that i am one of those girls...but still...ok i'm done drooling...he isn't that worthy anyways. The Onion has a funny take on it. It's crazy that i found about stupid hollywood gossip through the Onion. As Kitty Farmer so elequently puts it "sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion".

Humor

I was talking to someone about Hugh Grant and how he is self-depricating and charming and that it would really be fun to have a beer with him - but that's about all. His sense of humor strongly appeals to my sense of humor which tends to lean towards sarcastic/self - depricating humor. However, most of the time it doesn't really carry accross. I think one of the reasons it doesn't translate is that i'm a girl (or i'm not at all funny). It takes a really confident woman to be self-depricating without looking like she is pitying herself. It seems to me that men, in general, tend to have a better sense of humor than women, and the self-depricating thing is easier to carry off. I think it something to do with how we raise girls vs. boys in our society. It's more expected of the boys to be more adventurous and louder and say anything that comes into their minds, girls get censored more. I also tend to think that is why i like spending time with men more than women. However, my closest female friends have a really terrific sense of humor and taste for asdventure. Maybe that's why most women tend to site a sense of humor as one of the most important qualities in the opposite sex. (I know this post is random and written poorly - but that's all i could get out this afternoon.)

Favorite Word

I got the idea for this post from Karol and the site she linked to. I love words and i know many of you (aka Wendy) love them as well. So i was wondering what is your favorite word(s)? I already wrote that i like "lilac" and "pituitary." My name (in all it's different spellings) did not make the cut ...the closest - "fanny" comes in at 17,175.

Things I love about Israel #4

I love how direct and open people are in Israel. Maybe it's the heat or the toughness people acquire from living in a tense environment - but it exists for better or for worse. This can go into two streams - one where people are rude and hurt your feelings (or ask you (ahem - me) to take a shower with them after knowing me for 2 whole days - what chutzpah!) or where people are warm and don't bull shit you too much and expect the same from you. People are not of afraid of one another. It taught me to be a little bit more direct, to stand up for myself, and to live a little bit more.

13

I have been listening to Blur's 13 disc a lot. I noticed that Damon Albarn voice and many of Blur's songs have influence from David Bowie - or is it just general Brit pop?. Is that just me? Share the music knowledge people! I really am digging the song Tender - falling asleep to it almost every night. The rest of the disc is great too.

Reflections

Coming to Israel was probably one of the best things i have done in a long time. Although, i miss my family and friends, it was really important for me to leave my daily routine and see the "bigger" picture. I have made really great friends here and learned quite a lot about Israel, people in general, and myself. One of the most important things that i come to understand is healthy loneliness. I always thought that i can handle being alone quite well - but i think the isolation i experienced this Winter/Spring - was damaging for me. Only here did i feel the true pleasure of being unattached of being truly free and not feeling unhappy about it. The other night i took the copy of Bulgakov's Master and Margaritta (in Russian), the Nomad Jukebox, a few cigs, a lighter and went to sit on an edge of a nearby ravine. It was close to midnight, i read for a while - then put the book down, turned on Lucinda Williams' World Without Tears. It's quite comforting to listen to a thirty something singer sing beautifully about fucked up relationships ... allowing my twentysomething self not to feel bad how much i think about this shit. I lighted a cigarette and turned up the song Ventura - the sky was deep blue, almost black, the clouds were passing quickly, the trees were swaying, a red car drove by with two lovers inside - Haven't spoke to no one, haven't been in the mood...But I can't pretend - I wish I was somewhere else. I wanna watch the ocean bend,The edges of the sun,then I wanna get swallowed upon an ocean of love...Get a lump in my throat, and look down at my feet. Take the long way home, so I can ride around,Put Neil Young on and turn up the sound...Stand in the shower, clean this dirty mess,Give me back my power, and drown this unholyness. Lean over the toilet bowl, and throw up my confession,cleanse my soul, of this hidden obsession. - a completely white cat ran next to me, then i noticed her tail was black, quite strange, she stopped and looked at me, i stared back. I took a drag of the cigarette, and threw a white stone unto the rocks bellow. It felt amazing - to be alone, throwing stones into nothingness, being delighted everytime the stone made a sound. I was content-sad. I was thinking about a certain boy, my mother, the obstacles to come, and being here and now.

I heart...

I've been meaning to write about this for a while. I really enjoy reading Ken Wheaton's blog. It's funny, well written, and if i was a Republican i would be just like him (maybe i already am a bit). Plus the boy has really cute eyes. So the secret is out - I heart Ken.

What's the word in Hebrew for cute?

So the other day my friend from work, Sophie, had to perform community service to satisfy the conditions for the scholarship she receives. The community service entailed Sophie to hand out postcards in the mall detailing the evils of drugs. The funny thing is that the cards themselves didn't give out specific information but instead melodramatic asked the reader: Ecstasy, LSD, Pot.... DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY ARE MADE OF? CALL US AND FIND OUT! Mind you, Sophie was the same person who, when i complained about the lack of invitations in Israel to smoke the nargila, invited me to her house to smoke grass. The irony (or is paradox or hypocrisy - i don't know the correct word dammit!) of the situation was not lost on us.
So there we were, quietly making fun of the situation, when this little, blond haired, and big eyed boy came up to our table and quietely said:
"Ani haiti paam sual" - which roughly translates to "I was a fox once,"
To which my friend replied -"Really? And now you're a little boy?"
"Yup," said the little boy, "can't you see that I'm a boy now?"
"I sure can," said Sophie. Then he skipped away. Believe me when i tell you it was hilarious. Now i go around the office telling people in a cute voice - "I was a fox once, but now i'm a little boy."
On the side note, i was bummed that i wasn't able to get the poster of a baby bottle being used as bong. Sigh.

Things I love About Israel #7

I love how (overall) families are close knit. Especially dads! Whenever i see families out together it is usually the dad horsing around with the kids or changing diapers. Quite a different picture from the standard American family - where the dad is often absent or distant. They take joy in their children's childhoods (is that repetitive?) with the knowledge that in the future their kids will have to face the danger that comes with serving in the army.